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Some people have the power to move us with their words and this page contains my free monthly column and quotations from other people that reflect my approach to life and coaching. Over 500 women currently receive my monthly mind-mover by e-mail and you can subscribe here.
Are you more into staying well or getting better? Prevention or cure? It
struck me in the supermarket* this morning that the majority of us are
probably more inclined towards the latter; happier to take our health for
granted and bothered to work at it only when something goes wrong. But that’s
crazy when staying well is generally more rewarding, much easier and more
enjoyable than getting better – so my coaching message this month is about
being proactive in keeping your mind well and I hope it moves you.
That motherly British institution, the BBC, has started a campaign (“Headroom”)
to encourage us to take care of our mental wellbeing. As well as online
wellbeing guides (short videos from people who know what they’re on about)
there’s a space called “Mind
Spa” where you can do a temperature check on your current mental
wellness. It only takes a couple of minutes and just by accessing it (easily
and for free) you’re already starting to be more proactive about how you can
look after your noggin’.
Wellness isn’t something that just happens or that’s ours by rights, we have
to work at it. Think for a moment about what you’ve done recently to nourish
your mind, to energise yourself, to feel positive and optimistic about the
life in front of you. Maybe you’ve made an effort to do daily walks for
headspace? Committed to a weekly yoga class? Started keeping a gratitude
journal? Or perhaps like me you’re working on letting the little things go and
focussing on what actually matters? Or have you done nothing?
If it’s nothing, how about making today a turning point for being conscious
about promoting your own mental health? Small tweaks - as well as larger
shifts over time - in our attitudes and actions can make all the difference to
whether we’re limping along or have a lust for life.
Here are some of my straight-forward (and much-tested) suggestions to make a
positive impact on our mental wellbeing immediately. Do one in the next hour?
Tell yourself what’s good about you
Stop blaming external forces and making excuses
Have lunch breaks away from your desk
Get out in a green space
Spend time with joyful people
Tune into how you can help yourself
Do some heart-thumping exercise
Let go of a frustration
Set a goal and do a little towards it each day
Keep a note of little successes
Create at least one tidy, restful room at home
Do unexpected good things for others
Ask for help to tackle a problem or concern
Use your skills as best you can, as much as you can
Listen to music that absorbs and transports you
Sing your heart out
Acknowledge unhappiness and resolve to tackle it
Get some sunshine
Eat wholesome, unrefined foods
And my personal easy favourite: smile, smile, smile.
Research shows it can and does affect our mood for the better and it puts
other people in a good mood too.
* Waitrose started this canny little in-store charity
thing that lets the customer choose how the supermarket should distribute
£1000 between three local causes. Each time you shop you get to pop a token in
the box of your choice and the cash gets dished out according to the
proportion of tokens in each one. This happens at the end of the month then
three new charities are chosen. My interest in this is not from a community
spirit angle (yes, I applaud it) or a marketing perspective (yes, it’s neat)
but as an insight into what matters to people. And yes, yes, I know this is
not an empirical study with hard data but having watched the boxes for the
last four months I’ve noticed it’s the ‘cure’ rather than ‘prevention’ causes
that gets most of the support.
Here's to a November nurturing our beautiful minds,
Jessica Chivers,
The Thinking Woman's Coach.
"Whatever our past has been, it is the actions and attitudes today that have the greatest power to represent us to the world, to bring us pleasure, and to improve our horizons in life."
Dr Nick Baylis
"Lives based on having are less free than lives based either on doing or being."
William James
"Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action."
Benjamin Disraeli
"It's not what happens to us, but our response to what happens to us that hurts us."
Steven Covey
"Your only obligation in any lifetime is to be true to yourself. Being true to anyone else or anything else…is impossible. "
Richard Bach
"Don’t be afraid to take a big step. You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps."
David Lloyd George
"...in most circumstances having a go is better than spending all one's time thinking of reasons not to do something."
Richard Branson
"Don't be a slave to your ego, be humble, be willing to fail. Because ego is afraid to fail or lose face, it prevents someone reaching out to their full potential. Getting it wrong without worrying what others say or think is, I believe, one of the greatest secrets of success."
Delia Smith
"The truth of the matter is that there's nothing you can't accomplish if:
1) You clearly decide what it is that you're absolutely committed to achieving, 2) You're willing to take massive action, 3) You notice what's working or not, and 4) You continue. "
Anthony Robbins
"It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you don't stop."
Confucius
"Never give up. Never give in. Never be late. Volunteer for everything. Be polite. Smile. Learn from everything. Remember tomorrow."
Joanna Lumley
"Imagine that no one would ever, ever know or see anything that you ever did again. How does that change what you are thinking right now? Or what you are planning to do today? Try acting on these changes and seeing if you can identify the fear that brings up: this is the same fear that holds you back."
Benjamin Fry
"...we don't do the things we want to do...think of something you really care about. Then add hour to hour and calculate the fraction of your life that you've actually spent doing it."
George Orwell
"Change has a considerable psychological impact on the human mind. To the fearful it is threatening because it means that things may get worse. To the hopeful it is encouraging because things may get better. To the confident it is inspiring because the challenge exists to make things better. "
King Whitney Junior.
"People's tendency towards good is as water's tendency to flow downhill."
Mencius